cassiealexander (cassiealexander) wrote,

back, again –

Originally published at Cassie Alexander. You can comment here or there.

Home now. Last week, I was feeling good, and taking it easy, so I put my meds away...and I didn't think to take them with me to my folks.

The drive up to my folks was awful on my back, and the drive home even worse. We crashed in a hotel last night so I wouldn't have to finish driving home, but this morning's leg of drive was still bad. I had an appt with my PT this AM which was good, but oy. I've been putting off meds until the evening (which is now not long away, hooray!) because I needed to work on Shapeshifted -- but I'm really looking forward to them now, heh.

As soon as I got home I cancelled everything I was doing tomorrow. I called up my therapist and explained there was no way I could drive over to see her without pain. I got my housemates to clean the litterbox for me, and I've put a text in to a friend's child so I can pay them to come over and do light chores for me so I don't have to bend at all.

I don't mind taking it easy (well, that's a lie, I do, but I've gotten better at accepting it) but I'm getting more anxious the nearer we come to my "go back to work" date. I'm not seeing my MD until right before...and it's really not that far away. :/ There's no way I could work in my current state. I'll be honest, I'm scared. Scared they make me go back, and scared that when I do I'll do something that makes everything worse than it already is. Something maybe I can't rest my way out of (in theory, since that's not working all the way so far.)

The only plus side of my trip to see my folks (above seeing my folks, which was great! I missed them over Xmas with my back stuff, it was really good to hang out with them some! :D) was that I had a trip scheduled to LA for later in the month. I'd assumed I would drive down, but now I know that's impossible -- and Southwest was having a sale. So there's that :P.

On a more positive note, I'm rereading Shapeshifted now and it's good :D. I should be turning it in this Friday :D.

Tags: shapeshifted, uncategorized
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